Friday, March 28, 2008


It rained last night. So much that I couldn't put out my three recycling bins because if the paper is wet, they won't pick up. So I set my alarm for 6 am, and at 5:19, I woke up. I figured that since I was awake, I'd go ahead and put out the trash and the recycling. Good thing too - the trucks came at 5:54. I hate to think what I would've done had I had to deal with stinky trash and a mouse carcass for another week. It's raining again, and hard. And while FEMA tells me I don't live in a flood zone, my landlord told me he was required to get flood insurance when he bought the house. The creek isn't all that far from my house, and while I don't think the creek will get me, there is certainly no drainage. The ground is soggy; I have to walk in my yard to get my mail because a lake fills up in the street in front of my box. I'm debating getting flood insurance myself just for peace of mind.

Today I stayed inside the house all day, talking to Wiley via internet and unpacking bins. We went through 6 bins of books of Wiley's, and I now have four bins of books to donate and three bins of books to sell (I also went through my books again). On top of that, I made great progress in the office - I got through all of the bins on the floor and only have eight more bins to go through in the entire house before I'm finished. Of course, I'm running out of room...there are about 7 bins that can't be unpacked now, so I can't wait to see what's in the rest of the bins (two have even more books, and my three bookcases are already full!)

I start training to be a youth counselor/case worker on Monday. I have training for two weeks, and then they let me loose in a strange county I've never been in. While I was at Lowe's for the millionth time earlier this week, a guy told me he was from Greene county. I asked him if it was an easy place to navigate, and his response was, "If you stay on the main roads, you'll be fine, but if you have to go on the back roads, you're going to get lost." So if anyone's thinking of getting me a late birthday gift, I'll take a little GPS gadget. I need to find a map of this county...everyone says Greene county; they never say what town they live in. In Monroe, or Brown perhaps, we have a Gnaw Bone. Maybe they have something like that, like Cattail Junction or Wet Willy. But I'll find out soon enough.

I'm really nervous about this, and part of me wishes I'd stayed in the legal world. At least I knew what I was doing there, so I could have something comfortable somewhere in my life. There's nothing but change swirling around me - new city, new job, new friends, new home - and sometimes I feel like the boxelder bug in the toilet as it flushes: trying like hell to stay afloat, even though the vortex is pulling me down. It's not that I don't think I can do the job, but you never really know how something is going to treat you until you're in the thick of it. It's really a leap of faith; I think counseling is the way to go for me, and while I may have missed the mark by a hair, this could be really good experience for me and help me figure out if counseling is my next career. My career counselor three years ago told me to get out of the office; it wasn't for me. And I was ecstatic when I made the jump and moved overseas. But now that I'm back, reality has hit kinda hard. I can see why people choose to stay in one career for years - it's comfortable. And I have been so uncomfortable lately; anxious over the smallest thing (like mice, and having my power flicker and wondering if I blew a fuse how do I fix it, and worrying about flooding), almost to the point of brooding and getting no sleep (it's almost 1 am and I'm WIDE awake now). I'm guess I'm just ready to be settled. Not being settled is exhausting.


Anonymous said...

we hope most goes well as you navigate this new challenge; i guess you never know unless you try. know that we're all pulling for you. auntie em

Anonymous said...

When I left my safe zone career after over 20 years to go to Insurance of all things, I was petrified. Still am most days. Put her back into it and push forward.
And good luck!!!
Sister Sister